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If he does not want to give it to you then forcing him to enter a valid number will either send him to a competitor's site or make him enter a random string that fits your regex.
$ If the user wants to give you his phone number, then trust him to get it right.
For further analysis you can subscribe to one of many providers that will give you access to a database of valid numbers as well as tell you if they're landlines or mobiles, disconnected, etc. You would probably be better off using a Masked Input for this.
That way users can ONLY enter numbers and you can format however you see fit.
The Number:: Phone:: Normalize Perl module could be a source of inspiration.
How are extensions (e.g., 111-222-3333 x 44444) going to be handled? Even if you could write a big, hairy validator that would allow all the different legitimate formats, it would end up allowing pretty much anything even remotely resembling a phone number in the first place.